Fizbo the Clown and pep talk

"Turns out that Fizbo the clown is a real bad@$$."

-Modern Family

Sometimes while feeling down I give myself a pep talk in the mirror and point out my good qualities.

"Bob, you may not be totally awesome at a lot of things, but always remember that you are one he** of a cartographer."

It's the Mechanical Monsters! Look out!

I really love two things: robots and lame jokes/puns. Honestly it doesn't even have to be a good pun. I'm satisfied with even a weak attempt. Yesterday I bought a folder for each of my classes this upcoming semester and Michelle bought me a set of large robot stickers from the dollar store. Late last night the idea came to me to put a sticker on each folder. I laid there awake coming up with names for each robot/folder/subject combination. I came up with things like Civot 2 (Civilization 2), Philotron (Philosophy), and Biochemus Prime (Biochemistry). Brainstorming at 2 AM generally brings to light my best and worst ideas. Today, I chickened out and put the stickers on the inside of each folder. None of them were given names. It's okay though because robots don't have feelings.

Hey Michael. Sorry your movie sucks.

I read the synopsis and felt intrigued. Movie makers are always trying to make conflicts between different new groups: vikings vs. pirates, vikings vs. indians, vampires vs. samurai, etc. Legion offers something new. It features a fight between humans and warring angels. To the best of my knowledge, that is a completely new scenario. With enthusiasm, I opened the preview. It was awful and lame. I was thoroughly disappointed. I would prefer to sit through Bio-dome five times in a row over watching the preview again. It had potential, but they blew it.

The moment all you tree huggers have been waiting for.

He's back and he's mad!

The Burger of Ages

Today my life peaked while enjoying Carl's Jr.'s new Kentucky Bourbon Burger.  The fried onion straws, the bacon, the pepperjack cheese, and bourbon sauce came together in one manly synthesis of unearthly flavor and spice.  My only coherent thought throughout was in desperate attempt to ration the burger as to prolong its kind embrace.  In those few short moments of unparalleled, indulgent ecstasy my outer best self groped helplessly against the ravenous hunger within.   The flesh was weak.  And I am left wanting.

You should wear corduroy.

Nothing says 'cool' like corduroy.